Since the Chicago Tribune wrote an article featuring stay at home dads, there has been a lot of attention in the past few days for DAD’s , which I personally believe is warranted.
One of the quotes that was left out of the Chicago Tribune article about stay at home dads was “the stay at home dad is the new minority. People, brands, the public in general are still trying to figure out what to do with us because it is a growing and more or less new part of our modern world.”
Not that DAD’s are better or need more attention, they just need to be recognized. This piece does not invalidate stay-at-home moms, it celebrates the rise of stay-at-home dads.
To me it goes one step further, there would be no recognition for DAD’s it if wasn’t for mom’s who are out there wearing so many hats to insure the successful growth of their families. These are modern women, with open minds and should be celebrated not berated by angry bored housewives starving for web traffic.
One of the things that many people don’t know about DAD, is that I was almost killed in an accident over a year and a half ago. Since that time, I have had several surgeries, including spinal surgery in July, which left me paralyzed and incapable of doing much of anything.
At that time, my wife had to take on the role of “everything. “ Where some people would have crumbled and cried, she stood up in the ring of fire, threw her shoulders back and did what she had to, to make sure her family survived and grew. A lesson she learned from her mother and something she teaches our kids, by example.
That’s the kind of woman she is. She loves her family, she is a shining example to our children in courage, fortitude and grace. She isn’t a wanna be stand up comedian or a washed up Cubs blogger doing whatever she can to fit in with the “mean girls” and get clicks at any cost.
My wife has never posted pictures of herself in her underwear begging for likes or attacked another woman’s family. My wife, like the many wives who have husbands who stay at home, is a classy, hard working, educated woman, who leads by example, always, no exceptions.
While I learned to walk again, she was not only by my side, but there to support our family as they watched daddy go through the toughest time in his life. Watching my wife and her will of steel was and is an inspiration to me as I still recover from one procedure after another.
The article in the Tribune didn’t say, that DAD has to take 4 painkillers every day to be able to walk. That the simple act of bending over to pick up a toy sends massive amounts of pain up and down his shattered spine and at the end of the day, DAD falls into bed, unable to talk from the pain he is in and has been masking from his kids.
I’m not sharing this for you to feel sorry for me, we all have “our deal.” I am sharing the amazing story of my wife. WIFE is always there for me with a smile, a hug and to push me when I need it. There isn’t enough room in the paper for me to say how amazing she is or the credit she deserves.
She is my hero, she is a role model for our children. Always has, always will be. She leads by example, not by hate or bullying.
At the end of the day, it’s not a mom thing or a dad thing, it’s a family thing. This past weekend dozens of good men met in New Orleans at the Dad 2.0 Summit, a celebration of all fatherhood, stay at home dads included, but more importantly “family.” That’s what it’s about, taking care of your family, not credit, or web traffic or book deals, it’s about family. These are the men I respect and admire; they truly “get it.”
Sometimes it’s a 50-50 split, sometimes it’s 90-10, but all the time it’s about family.
Friday was yet another procedure on my spine, it left DAD in bed all weekend hardly able to move. While “the” article hit the stands, some people decided to personally attack what it stood for, DAD was helpless in bed,stuck having to watch his wife cry at the hatred that spilled from the hateful attacks of other people aimed directly at our family.
What should have been a celebration of “family” became a sad day for everyone in our family.